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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 5, 2016 20:22:06 GMT
TLOM,classic,i forgot of dat one because he is Zeka, The Lord Of Keks Yet i'am the King of Keks
>Grade 8
>Walking to the bathroom
>Tard wrangler standing outsite the toilet area
>"Hey anon, adam is in there, try not to bother him"
>Alright
>Walk in, see adam pacing around in a huff
>Pull up to the urinal, start to pee
>Adam stares into the gap between my arm and the urinal
>"Adam thats not okay, seriously, just go"
>I forget adam can only say either "are you okay" and "am I okay"
>"Are you okay"
>"Yes, adam! Just stop looking at my noodle!"
>I zip up
>He is angry I yelled
>He storms around the bathroom making the sound of a rusty shopping cart wheel
>"ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU OKAY"
>thisistheend.png
>Hops up onto the sink
>Craps a bit
>Hops down, finishes the rest of his dump on the floor
>"AM I OKAY AM I OKAY AM I OKAY"
>Tard wrangler hears commotion
>Walks in, sees him and I and the mess
>"ANON WHA-"
>Adam throws a rock at her
>wat.jpg
>Throws a handful of playground pebbles at her
>She has her faced turned into a corner
>He dumps a bunch of big rocks into the urinals
>Runs out of the bathroom
>Hits there stairs and falls down them colliding with the resident black guy
>"DUDE WHAT THE HELL"
>Realizes its adam, smeared in feces
>Takes off
>Im walking back to class
>Hear the vice principal talking to adam
>ARE YOU OKAY AM I OKAY ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU ARE YOU ARE
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Post by KillBot on Mar 6, 2016 9:55:58 GMT
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Post by Yoshi07 on Mar 6, 2016 12:00:40 GMT
because he is Zeka, The Lord Of Keks Yet i'am the King of Keks
>*Insert Tard Story Here*
1562! seriously, why the fuck they mix normal and sane persons with people with ace's stupidity? still, keep em coming lol |
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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 6, 2016 17:56:48 GMT
Feminists or tard (well,feminists are just fat tards) stories are always funny af.
btw you wrote that inside quote lmao.
>Be me
>Working at an engineering firm
>In the big office
>On our floor are like 20 cubicles with space for
>2 desks, charis computers etc etc
>Get paired with some bro hispanic guy called Ricardo
>2 cubicles down is some fat feminist
>Filing a cost report on some water damage in a high rise
>Ricardo walks into cubicle
>"Hey anon, come check this out"
>go with him to feminist cubicle
>No one's in there
>Her computer is unlocked
>"change her wallpaper to a swastika man she'll go loco"
>Naa man I got a better idea
>Watch my back Ric
>download loads of fat shaming pics from google
>loads of stuff on diabetes and harpoons
>make one of those changing wallpaper things that changes picture every 10 seconds or so
>Set up 7 of these pics
>Change the time it takes to go in sleep mode to 10 seconds
>invert mouse
>set mouse sensitivity to lowest
>She's a tard she'll never know how to fix it
>flip screen upside down on monitor
>Run back to cubicle and try to be cool
>she gets back 30 minutes later with her cubicle buddy
>Hear her loudly say "what the hell"
>She tells one of the techies and who just starts laughing
>She flips
>trashes her cubicle
>raging like a roido on bull shark testosterone
>Boss comes in
>see's the damage
>”Nala, one more outbreak and you're fired, you hear?”
>She takes a week off
Another story:
>Sitting in cubicle with a coffee and making a timetable on excel
>Ricardo is off sick so no funny times today
>Nala the feminist shoves her fat greasy face into my cubicle
>Anon, I got a leaflet for you
>flicks her fat sausage fingers and a piece of paper lands on my desk
>she waddles off down the aisle
>Lean over the wall and say to the guy in the cubicle behind me
>Yo drake, did femme fatale over there give you one of these?
>"Pfff don't even read it”
>Typical
>anyway this stupid leaflet is talking about fairness in the workplace and about how women should be given separate cubicles from men
>wtf?
>walk to my bosses office
>Boss is pretty sweet with me so he doesn't mind that I'm bothering him on his schedule
>"what's up anon?"
>Has nala given you one of these?
>I show him the leaflet
>"What the…?"
>"Anon let me hold on to this"
>No problem, timetable is almost done by the way
>"Nice one"
>go back to cubicle
>working away
>Boss comes past a few minutes later
>Walks into nala's cubicle
>At this point everyone knows she's a retard and always in trouble, and she always flips when she is so this gun b gud
>Boss says "Nala, what is this?"
>"Oh just a little suggestion"
>"A suggestion? You want to try and change the department but don't even ask me? What the hell do you need a separate cubicle for?
>”Well, I don't feel comfortable around men in the same room”
>Rants on and on about muh feelings
Turns out she was trying to hide a mini fridge in her cubicle and her cubicle partner threatened to tell the boss
Last story about how Ricardo got fired:
>Tuesday afternoon
>mid summer so it's boiling hot
>Ricardo's mother had died 2 weeks before so he wasn't in a joking mood, pretty silent
>Feminist fattison sends out a department email
>Department emails are usually reserved for crucial info and flash on your screen so that you can't miss it
>"Attention accounting, I, along with several other women in the company will be hosting an anti discrimination meeting this saturday at blah blah street at 5 o clock, It is compulsary to attend"
>Hear collective groan on the floor
>Ricardo stands up
>"WE'RE NOT GOING TO YOUR DAMN MEETING, PUTA"
Dead silence, typing has stopped, you could hear a mouse fart on the street outside that's how quite it was
>10 seconds go past
>"WHO SAID THAT?
>People are standing on their desks looking around
>hear the stomping of the elephant as she paces down towards our cubicle
>"I DID"
>Ricardo walks out of the cubicle in front of her
>She stares at him with eyes closely resembling the mad butcher
>She spits in his face
>Dennis, the black guy 4 cubicles down goes "oh sh*t man"
>"YOU SPIC F*CK"
>Ricardo goes full aaron hernandez
>never seen him so angry
>Punches her dead in the face with the force of a thousand suns
>Her nose cracks under his hairy mexican fist >She falls over and almost causes an earthquake
>hear bosses door opening
>She rolls around trying to get up
>"YOU ILLEGAL F*CK, I'LL KILL YOU, I'M GOING TO TELL THE COPS YOU RAPED ME, YOU'RE GETTING THE INJECTION YOU SPIC"
>Ricardo rips off his tie
>YOU DON KNOW ME, YOU FAT B*TCH, NO ONE HERE LIKES YOU, I WOULD TELL YOU TO JUMP OFF THE ROOF BUT YOU MIGHT KILL 50 PEOPLE"
>Insert spanish swear rant
>She starts bawling her eyes out
>Ricardo storms out
>Police arrive 10 minutes later
>Whole floor had to give a statement
>Fatso actually accused Senor ricardo of rape
>Everyone on the floor liked ricardo so they told the cops it was crap and she provoked him
>Ricardo comes in the next day and starts collecting his things from his cubicle
>Ric, man yesterday she had it coming for her
>"Ahh is ok man, cops interviewed me yesterday, they know she called me a spic so I think i'll be getting off the hook"
>I suppose that's good, it sucks that you have to be fired
>"hey man you've been a real good partner man, see you around"
>Ricardo gives me a smile and leaves
>Fat deminist doesn't come in for the rest of that week
>See her on monday
>She has a gigantic bandage around her face
>turns out he fractured her nose and her brow bone
>every time she walks into anyone elses cubicle, they picked up the phone and pretended to be congratulating ricardo for his deeds
>She quits after 3 weeks, our told the story of ricardo to every newfag that joined the department, he was a hero in our comapny
That's the story of senor ricardo, greatest mexican who ever lived.
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Post by Yoshi07 on Mar 8, 2016 19:02:04 GMT
Feminists or tard (well,feminists are just fat tards) stories are always funny af. btw you wrote that inside quote lmao.
*The Story of senor ricardo, greatest mexican who ever lived.*
hail señor ricardo, best hispanic bro and hero of the company oh and don't worry, everyone has their stupid moment, and i had mine lol. btw 1564 |
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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 9, 2016 17:06:56 GMT
1565
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Post by KillBot on Mar 11, 2016 13:27:48 GMT
1566 funny shit
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Post by Hannah on Mar 12, 2016 13:43:02 GMT
1567
dis sum gud shit
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Post by Yoshi07 on Mar 12, 2016 16:01:57 GMT
1568! yeah i agree, we need moar keks m8erino |
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Post by Hannah on Mar 13, 2016 0:14:48 GMT
1569
can sum1 make a senor ricardo movie pls
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Post by Drugs47 on Mar 13, 2016 11:18:22 GMT
1570 wow this community isnt dead already ?
and wtf it has 2 owners
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Post by zekamalikyd on Mar 13, 2016 11:56:12 GMT
yes me and myself
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Post by KillBot on Mar 13, 2016 13:28:29 GMT
1572 kek
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Post by Scoper on Mar 15, 2016 8:22:43 GMT
no, ines already left, i'm the only owner again and hosting 3 servers that isnt n-s but anyone from n-s gets admin if they join the #hakd on quakenet
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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 15, 2016 17:19:03 GMT
no, ines already left, i'm the only owner again and hosting 3 servers that isnt n-s but anyone from n-s gets admin if they join the #hakd on quakenet couldnt connect to that in webchat.quaknet, RIP admon dreams |
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Post by Yoshi07 on Mar 15, 2016 19:07:18 GMT
no, ines already left, i'm the only owner again and hosting 3 servers that isnt n-s but anyone from n-s gets admin if they join the #hakd on quakenet welp, at least its something  oh and 1575 |
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Post by Scoper on Mar 15, 2016 21:42:27 GMT
1576 me counting for once
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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 15, 2016 22:21:52 GMT
1577,still too far from 2k
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Post by Hannah on Mar 16, 2016 12:53:57 GMT
1578, still no mank demes
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Post by Yoshi07 on Mar 16, 2016 15:58:07 GMT
1579, still no skrublords getting dunked on by memes
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Post by zekamalikyd on Mar 16, 2016 19:24:26 GMT
1578, still no mank demes you are the reason we should start sacrificing virgins again |
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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 17, 2016 19:01:41 GMT
Ditto
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Post by Scoper on Mar 17, 2016 20:12:46 GMT
1578, still no mank demes you are the reason we should start sacrificing virgins again Soo.. we're gonna sacrifice you? |
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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 17, 2016 23:04:47 GMT
you are the reason we should start sacrificing virgins again Soo.. we're gonna sacrifice you?  |
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Post by zekamalikyd on Mar 18, 2016 17:49:30 GMT
literally everyone in this forum is getting sacrificed
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Post by Yoshi07 on Mar 18, 2016 21:33:38 GMT
literally everyone in this forum is getting sacrificed 1585, enough watching from the background, karma will ensue and zeka will fukken sacrifice us, you fukkin doomed us all gg lol. Welp, Rest In Pasta. |
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Post by EpicBaron on Mar 19, 2016 0:27:03 GMT
literally everyone in this forum is getting sacrificed 1585, enough watching from the background, karma will ensue and zeka will fukken sacrifice us, you fukkin doomed us all gg lol. Welp, Rest In Pasta. Pepperinos plés |
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Post by zekamalikyd on Mar 19, 2016 0:27:13 GMT
all right faggots line up i'm sacrificing all of you to chin chin and it's not even sacrifice season
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Post by Hannah on Mar 19, 2016 3:55:17 GMT
1588 never forgetti mom's spaghetti
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Post by Scoper on Mar 20, 2016 12:12:13 GMT
stfu satisfii
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